About The Author
Welcome!! This is a place of free-thinking, clashing ideas, societal standards, resistance, gender profiling, political correctness, much more political incorrectness, swearing, objective and subjective observations, secrets that are not so secret, recipes (from cakes to cocktails, with emphasis on the latter), and so much more. I’d include laundry tips but I tend to dye things pink.
This is where I unpack my bags, empty the pockets of my apron, and expose the truth of what lies under the bed, in the vegetable drawer, and on the shopping list. Amazingly, it’s not just about about my narcissistic Schattenkind tendencies, but about the social/cultural world we live in. And the relationship of baking soda to salt.
This place is about the modern housewife. And more. It’s about 1963 revival, where happy hour is standard and women still drink when pregnant (only mixed with a slurpy so no one suspects). On the electronic pages of this blog, we’ll explore the world of the stay-at-home-parent (note the rare politically correct usage here). We’ll try to find a radder name for it too because that one sounds so passé. I’m thinking Retro Mom. MILF is applicable too but a little over-used. And while I am a strong advocate of using the F-word, I find using it in an acronym loses some of the panache.
This place is where we explore the challenges of a balanced life in modern society. We’ll ask questions like: How can I eat five of the cupcakes I just made and still fit into my jeans? Why does America resist the new Health Care package? Why did God make Republicans? Did Republicans make God? How can I explain to my kid that the cat ate some of the cupcakes I made for the school party and she’ll have do decide which kids she doesn’t think deserve a cupcake? Is it possible to feel sexy in an apron? When homeopathy fails, can I just go straight to Benadryl?
And here’s a great one: Should women stay at home to raise their kids?
And another: Can women be fulfilled staying at home raising their kids?
Better yet: Can women be fulfilled?
Or even: Why can’t we just get the fuck over ourselves and be happy?
From cake decorating to multiple orgasms, I’m dedicating myself to exploring the answers to all these questions and more!
And a little about me: Most people know me as Ammi Midstokke. I live in Germany with my husband and our five-year-old daughter, B. That’s no attempt at hiding identification of my toddler by use of her first name - we actually do call her B. I am a stay-at-home-mom and writer who finds joy in ironing my husband’s shirts. Before you puke on your keyboard, let me tell you, it was not always that way. But the man brings me Prada shoes on occasion, so I wear them while ironing and trust me, ironing got way funner.
Favorite song: Anything by Bruce Springsteen
Greatest fear: Losing a limb
Most frequently used phrase: “Do I need to count to three?”
I bake, sew, feed the neighborhood with my latest kitchen experiments, mountain bike, and write. I do art projects with my kid, clean my house, have sex, knit sweaters, and run marathons. I also drink vats of coffee and take more vitamins than a pharmaceutical rep. When I’m not making the rest of the world sick by appearing totally happy and balanced in my life, I’m kicking myself for not being a better mother, eating too many cupcakes, not understanding the yen/dollar relationship, neglecting my husband, or generally failing at perfection somehow, because just like everyone else, I’m human.